We are each born to embark on our hero's journey. Most of us are unaware that we are on one, but we ALL are. At 12, I was fortunate to become aware of mine and knew my mission was to help every hurting child, but I was still lost as to understand what it all meant. I had noticed patterns and wondered how our world could be filled with so many inequities, which led to spending much of my youth struggling with anxiety and depression. I knew intuitively that I had to trust the journey, but when I tried connecting the dots before they were ready, I was filled with anxiety. I would listen over and over as Tears for Fears would sing, "Everybody wants to Rule the Word."
"Welcome to your life
There's no turning back
Even while we sleep
We will find you
Acting on your best behavior
Turn your back on Mother Nature
Everybody wants to rule the world."
There's no turning back
Even while we sleep
We will find you
Acting on your best behavior
Turn your back on Mother Nature
Everybody wants to rule the world."
The lyrics spoke to me. Tears for Fears put words to music that I also saw through my observations. What was this life about, and why must I endure so much suffering and pain? I wanted to turn back many times, but as Tears for Fears lyrics suggested, "Welcome to your life, there's no turning back." I knew that I had to trust that my learning journey would unfold as it was supposed to. Now I can connect my dots (stars) looking back and have learned that my life has been filled with all the lessons to help me realize my dream and fulfill my calling. I didn't have to do anything special, I just had to live and trust how my stars connect. Thich Nat Hahn shared, "No Mud, No Lotus." This is true for us all. The obstacle is the way, and the way is through. This is what life and learning here are all about.
Each path is differentiated for the learner and is connected to our family and the generations that lived before us. Maslow wrote about this in "The Farther Reaches of Human Nature." The needed support can be understood as we connect my stars through Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. The journey is challenging for all. Different problems present themselves as we move through each level of the pyramid. There are times when trauma can move us back before we can move forward again.
It can be baffling to some that a child that is loved and cared for can sometimes need just as much support and understanding as a child without access to resources. An important thing to remember is we truly only know our journey. When I connected the stars for myself, my life was filled with challenges I had to overcome to be where I am today. Each obstacle was a layer that had to be focused on so that I could push forward and move through to the next while tying to notice and savor the bright spots along the way. As we move past a challenge, it gives us the confidence to tackle the next. I also believe that there is no accidental meetings. Every situation is mutually beneficial when we understand that everyone is our teacher. This process ensures that we are always learning though out our lifetime. This is something that we ALL have in common and that we can begin to see as we connect the stars to where we ALL are today.
Comparing one learning journey to another and saying that one was more difficult and needs more resources will never bring us all together. While the support may look different, the big idea is that every person desires for their child to be successful, and when a child is not thriving, a system of understanding and compassion must be present. Maslow's Hierarchy can be used to frame our very different journeys and look at them through a positive lens so we can better define the system of support that we provide.
Comparing one learning journey to another and saying that one was more difficult and needs more resources will never bring us all together. While the support may look different, the big idea is that every person desires for their child to be successful, and when a child is not thriving, a system of understanding and compassion must be present. Maslow's Hierarchy can be used to frame our very different journeys and look at them through a positive lens so we can better define the system of support that we provide.
I made this video in 2017 to explain my difficulty navigating the world as a neurodiverse learner. Going through these challenges helped me to become a better educator. My life learning journey has been all about facing each challenge layer by layer and gaining tools in my toolbox to be where I am today. While in school, I had many strengths that overshadowed my challenges. Although my family life was unstable, I had access to resources and love from my divorced parents, which I am grateful for. When I had my son whose challenges overshadowed his strengths in his early years, I finally understood why we need a comprehensive understanding of the educational supports that are provided for all levels of the pyramid.
At 44, I knew it was time to move through a new door. I reached the Esteem Needs level of the pyramid as a public educator, but when my son needed support to navigate the school system, along with my own two near-death experiences, forced me to think differently about a way to be true to my calling. I thought since I was so lucky to know my purpose that, this meant my needs were not important. This is where my ego got things wrong. Getting sick and my son needing more support were signs that there was another way for me. This led to leaving my beloved profession, focusing on my mental health and well-being, supporting my family, and creating services that I saw were needed within school systems for educators, parents, students, paraprofessionals, and managers. By taking this road less traveled, Cope Consulting LLC was born!
There can be no agenda if we are to truly help all members of the team to feel vulnerable enough to share their truth and contribute toward the problem-solving process. The amygdala, fearful voice of our brain, often creates disparaging stories of others that are very different from reality. This work takes focus, time, patience, love, and compassion. The problems that are coming forward need support from all stakeholders. It has taken 250 years for us to get here. While there is no easy button, if you look around, you can already see the glimmers of change.
I understand that in the current way we budget and allocate resources in education, it would appear that we don't have enough resources to support ALL. But I believe that if we work together, we can find ways to multiply and be more efficient with the resources we have. It isn't about more, it's about communication of what we have, explaining the resources that are available and removing barriers to access those supports when needed.
I will be 52 on March 12, 2023, and my stars ✨ have finally connected❣️We each have a special mission to accomplish on earth. 🌎 There is no accident that my mom named me after the character Dana Lambert, played by Lesly Ann Warren, in the 1970-1971 Mission Impossible television series❣️ I love that my earthly mission has been to help prove that the vision of advancing learning for ALL is Possible❣️ Our systems are breaking down so we can think differently and start rebuilding. Let's work together to dream about a future where we can help our youth self-actualize and travel to Reach the Farther Reaches of Human Nature❣️🚀 Together, Everything is POSSIBLE❣️